Firebird 2015AD Then & Now

File this under silly and fun. Here it’s another “lost” Then & Now shot long ago, somehow forgotten about and only recently rediscovered. When you’ve got diseased brains like us, it’s bound to happen! In this one we duplicate a scene from a 1980s sci-fi B-movie shlock-fest called Firebird 2015AD. It’s one of those movies that defies description, an hour and half long train wreck you can’t turn away from. To steal that overused line, once watched, it can’t be unwatched. Calling it a stinker is showing far too much respect. It’s time we’ll never get back.

Truth is we actually enjoyed it (somewhat) and some of you who share a similar fondness for movie kitsch might as well. No lofty expectations here though. There’s low production values, insipid acting and a plodding story line written by someone who if found should be shot and laughable special effects. One has to work real hard to be this bad and in honour of ineptitude we think some of you should join the club of people who have viewed it in its entirety. So a couple hundred of us the world over. Maybe. If you can find it.

Firebird 2015 offers up a loosely woven dystopian-esque story, a poor man’s Mad Max road movie, shot on tight budget (said to be $900k*). It’s the future world of 2015 and cars are outlawed, without ever explaining why, by the The Department of Vehicle Control (the evil DVC). Roaming the wastelands in their outlawed rides are “Burners” deifying the government mandate. Hunted down by the feds they’re dealt with heavy handily when caught. There’s some subplot, a love story of sorts, some minor stuff (our attention waned), but that’s it right there, pretty much the entire story line. It must have been written in an afternoon after finishing a flat of Black Label.

“A boy… A girl… A car. Only the car is forbidden”…the greatest tagline ever! Or not. Reviews from regular folks tell all: “The Not-So Fast and the Furiously Boring”, “More like FireBORED 2015 A.D.”, “So bad it’s…..bad” and “On the WORST movie list”. That sums it up well, eh? Another adds: “Well… This was an awesome movie when I first saw it. Unfortunately that was when I was six years old. So, if you’re a six year old looking for a taught sci-fi thriller then this is your movie.” It takes a beating from reviewers.

The film debuted early fall 1981 in Madison Wisconsin. After Hollywood, that’s the go-to for premieres such as this. It had a sort theatre run, there was a VHS tape made, then it was promptly forgotten. Till this post!

One reason we like the film is the locations used. It was shot in the Alberta Badlands in the Red Deer River Valley near Drumheller, in many places we recognize or know of. It might appeal to you too for this very reason, if you hail from the area. The old Atlas Mine makes an appearance, so does the historic Historic East Coulee Bridge, as does the building in the scene we’re duplicating, showing a former gas station repurposed. In over all look and in profile the building is little changed.

Then! In the opening credits the gas station is seen briefly, setting the tone, The structure’s decrepit and disused and the gas pumps locked up tight. Scatted about there’s a number of old cars long in retirement, the overall vibe that of a place no longer needed. No gas, no gas station.

The building is an old Texaco dating back to the 1930s. That vintage sign frame! When built, it stood on the main road through East Coulee but now the whole town’s bypassed. It’s not completely clear when it closed, but the late 1970s is suggested. In the movie you can see it had been shuttered for a time. Known earlier as East Coulee Motors it was later shortened to just Coulee Motors, but most folks seemed to call it Sloan’s Garage after its long time owner.

Darren McGavin stars in Firebird 2015. He’s acted in many films and TV shows with quite the resume spanning the years 1945-1999. If asked, I’m certain he’d say this movie was not a high point in his career. That “Love Boat” gig maybe, or perhaps that “What’s My Line” appearance, but FB2015, no way. Not that we’ll ever know, as he passed away some years back. Hey, he was Billy Madison’s dad. Brian Madison: “You remember that spelling bee you won in the 1st grade? Rock? R-o-k?” Haha! Other actors who appear in this movie include…oh, never mind. You wouldn’t know them anyway.

Now! The building today belongs to Dinosaur Valley Studios, makers of prehistoric dinosaur models for museums and such. Some are huge and some you might even know of, say if you’ve wandered about Drumheller. The business comprises the old gas station with some newer drive in bay additions to the right. An old hotel used to stand on the property too. At one time, this was downtown East Coulee Alberta.

We’re friends with those who own/run Dino Studios, one of them being Rob Pohl who appears on this website from time to time. That large format film shooting guy with the house sized camera. That’s him. We often use “Hotel Dino” as a crash pad when we’re in area. A disused meeting office above one bays does the trick. We like the price too – free! Or at worst a six pack paid in tribute. It gets a five star TripAdvisor review.

Looking inside the old Texaco hardly makes one think gas station. Still, one there’s the original roof beams, some showing fire damage from eons ago. Outside, modern siding covers the old.

Look, it’s the mighty BIGDoer-mobile doing a photobomb. We’ll make that little cheap-ass econo-box with Jeep aspirations famous yet. The places we’ve gone. While a Pontiac Firebird is probably looked upon fondly by old car aficionados I doubt in the future some crappy 2016 Cruze will elicit any sentiment. Even a Pinto gets more love and respect.

We obsess about everything! With that said, we lined up our shot reasonably but still the badlands in the back look off. That it’s a low res original and badly distorted doesn’t help.

East Coulee only dates from the late 1920s. It was a coal mining town plain and simple and today is a sleepy little burg with lots of old miners shacks tuned into summer cabins or retirement homes. Here’s an untouched one we toured, a locked up time capsule from the 1980s, after the owners passed. See: The Humble Miner’s Cottage.

There’s other scenes from FB2015AD we’d like to duplicate but sadly most of the locations are today off limits for various reasons. Still, we make take a stab at it. Stay tuned.

If you’ve mange to find the film and watch it (there’s bad copy on Youtube), share your review in the comments below.

*It would seem to us much of the budget was squandered on good times at the East Coulee Hotel Beer Parlour. It sure didn’t go towards making a good film.

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”Love the articles and blog posts. Very informative and interesting. Chris and Connie do a great job of researching and writing. The photos are amazing! Love it all.” Lila Cugini.

More movie Then & Nows…
Superman 1978 – Earthquake! – Filmed nearby.
Brokeback Mountain then and now – Twist Ranch.
Then and now – Wild Horse Hank.
Journey of Natty Gann – reform school.

If you wish more information on what you’ve seen here, by all means contact us!

Date of Adventure: May, 2017.
Location: East Coulee, AB.
Article references and thanks: Dinosaur Valley Studios, Internet Movie Database.

A “Firebird 2015AD” Then & Now!

Once you watch it, you can’t unwatch it.

Now it’s where dinosaurs are made.